Parents, children and honour: everybody thinks they are protecting her

Every adult in this play believes they are looking after Juliet, and she still dies alone in a tomb with a knife. Nobody sets out to hurt her. Her father, her mother, the Nurse and the Friar all mean well, and this video finds where the harm comes from.

Parents and children is one of the play's big ideas and has a video to itself, while the story in order lives in the Overview.

Here is the claim this video argues: in the Capulet house, protecting Juliet and controlling her turn out to be the same act. Honour here means a family's good name, and status means its rank. In Shakespeare's time a daughter's marriage was decided for the family's honour, which is why every adult feels entitled to a say. It starts on Sunday, with Capulet doing the right thing. Paris asks for Juliet, and her father answers: My child is yet a stranger in the world, She hath not seen the change of fourteen years. A stranger in the world is someone still new to it. Shakespeare gives Capulet protection first: she is too young, so the answer is not yet. Then he tells Paris how to go about it: But woo her, gentle Paris, get her heart, My will to her consent is but a part. Three readings of that second line: Capulet will decide alone, Juliet's own agreement is part of the decision, or Paris must first ask the Prince. Which of those three readings does Capulet's line support? The second. His wish is only one share of it, so her yes counts too, and in Act 1 that is how he protects her. What changes Capulet by Tuesday has a video of its own, the one on Lord Capulet. This one follows what all the adults do with the same power.

Juliet's mother is the first parent to turn, in Act 3 Scene 5, when Juliet refuses to marry Paris on Thursday. Lady Capulet's report to her husband is one line: I would the fool were married to her grave! Fool is her word for her own daughter. Married to her grave puts a wedding and a death in one breath, and it comes from the mother before the father has raised his voice. Juliet replies with a line that names what is happening to her: Proud can I never be of what I hate - But thankful, even for hate that is meant love. In hate that is meant love, what is the hate, and who means it as love? The hate is the marriage to Paris, and her parents mean it as love. What hurts her is offered as care, which is this video's claim in Juliet's own words. Her father hears that no, and Shakespeare gives him the language of ownership. Out, you green-sickness carrion! Out, you baggage! You tallow-face! Carrion is rotting flesh, baggage is a good-for-nothing girl, and tallow is candle fat. These are words for property gone bad, not for a daughter. Good father, I beseech you on my knees - Hear me with patience but to speak a word. Beseech means beg. She kneels, she calls him good father, and she asks to speak one word, and Shakespeare gives her father no pause to hear it. Both parents meet her refusal with ownership, and both believe they are doing their duty by her.

The Nurse and the Friar stand in for parents in this play, and they fail her in the same way the real ones do. On Monday, when the news of Tybalt's death reaches the house, the Nurse gives Juliet a verdict on every man alive. There's no trust, No faith, no honesty in men, all perjured, All forsworn, all naught, all dissemblers. Perjured and forsworn both mean promise-breakers, and dissemblers are liars. She judges by the latest disaster, and on Tuesday she tells Juliet to marry Paris. Three ways to read that advice: the Nurse has stopped loving Juliet, Capulet has paid her off, or she is offering what looks safest. Which of those three readings fits the Nurse, and why? The third. Like the parents with Paris, she hands Juliet the easiest road and calls it care rather than cruelty. The Friar fails the same way with more skill. His plan decides everything for her, and when it goes wrong at the tomb, he hears the watch coming and leaves her there. One line from Act 3 Scene 5 ties it together. Her father storms out, and Juliet turns to her mother: O sweet my mother, cast me not away! Her mother refuses to speak to her. Cast away means thrown out, and the last door in the house closes, which is when Juliet goes to the Friar with a knife.

That is where the harm comes from, and it is not cruelty. Every adult treats a thirteen-year-old's future as a family decision, and decides it for her. That is why the kindest adult and the harshest fail her the same way, and why she dies alone in that tomb.

One examiner's report backs the angle you have just heard, and it is worth hearing in full. There were many who focussed on status and how this causes division between families. There were some mature responses to this when discussing how love is often overlooked when the head of a family determines who will marry who. The habit that earns the word mature is this: write about who gets to decide, rather than about whether Capulet is nice. Now an essay question to plan. How does Shakespeare use the adults in this play to show that protecting Juliet and controlling her are the same thing? Three nudges, if you want them. Start with Capulet in Act 1, not Act 3. Ask what changed for him, not for her. And put the Nurse and the Friar in the same paragraph as the parents. Can you plan three paragraphs for that question? Give it a go before the reveal. Here is one plan. First, the father on Sunday, protecting her by asking for her consent, and how far that has moved by Tuesday. Paragraph two is both parents meeting her refusal with ownership, and Juliet naming it herself as hate that is meant love. Paragraph three is the Nurse and the Friar, the substitute parents, failing her the same way, with her mother's silence as the last door closing. Two turns to avoid. Calling Capulet an evil father and stopping there cannot explain the father of Act 1. And leaving the Nurse and the Friar out loses the two adults who raised and advised her.

Five to finish, starting with Capulet on Sunday and ending on a parent this video never mentioned. Capulet on Sunday: my child is yet a stranger in the what? The world. My child is yet a stranger in the world. Next, Juliet's own phrase: thankful, even for hate that is meant what? Love. The hate is the marriage, and her parents mean it as love. Now the Nurse: no trust, no faith, no what in men? Honesty. There's no trust, No faith, no honesty in men. Try the Prologue: what is the only thing that can end the parents' rage? Their children's deaths. Which, but their children's end, nought could remove. Nought means nothing, and the play is telling you before it starts that this ends in a tomb. One more: Montague cannot learn why his son is sad. Does he fit the claim? Yes. In Act 1 he loves Romeo and worries, but he leaves Benvolio to find out what is wrong, so even this father decides how to help without hearing his child.

Arguing this without calling any adult a villain means you're on top of this one, and that deserves your thumbs up. Still shaky is fine: keep the video saved, then write the three-paragraph plan out once on paper, because a plan you have written is a plan you keep.

Next in the chapter: Fate: star-crossed, or just fast?

For more, visit scholafly.com, or watch the next video.